I ended up feeling drained, stressed and really worried about the small details in life rather than looking at the bigger picture, as well as feeling guilty that because of all this I couldn't dedicate time to the hobbies and people I enjoy.
A lot can change in a week but it wasn't until I looked back at the year and saw how much I have actually achieved and been through that I realised I was being way too hard on myself about the little things I didn't do.
One of the best things I have achieved is changing my thought process, although I still have a long way to go. I feel as though I am stronger at removing negativity from my life and try harder to be more positive and kind at times when I am at my lowest.
After looking back at everything that has happened in 2014, I feel like I'm in a good place to set some realistic and positive goals for the new year. These will be flexible and are small steps to my overall goals because 2014 has taught me that life gets in the way and you can't always be perfect, no matter how hard you try.
1. Read more: My commute to and from work used to be the perfect time for me to catch up on reading but since I started driving I have found it really hard to find any time at all. Reading is one of my favourite hobbies and now I am starting a new job and will have to commute on the tube I am hoping that I can pick this up again.
2. Stress less: Since moving into our own home I have become really controlling and almost obsessive about everything looking and being perfect, which has in turn extended into other parts of my life. Being away and spending time at both our families homes has really put things into perspective. I want to spend more time on my hobbies, relaxing and making memories than obsessively cleaning and worrying about stupid things.
3. Focus on my health: Quite a broad resolution but I want to continue working on my mental health and positive well being as well as building on our healthy eating and exercise plan. We tend to eat quiet healthily anyway, but we want to invest in a juicer and make a bit more of an effort. Exercise wise I was doing nothing because I couldn't find the time but now I'm going to make time as much as possible, even if its just going for a brisk walk through the fields with Matt.
4. Spend more 'me' time: Like I said before, I seem to spend most of my spare time looking after the house and our little unit and feel guilty when I spend anytime doing something for me. I'm going to put my happiness first and start doing more hobbies. I want to learn to sew properly, do more crafty things in general, blog and youtube more among other things. At the same time I am not going to pressurise myself at consistently posting here as it was making me quite unhappy when I wasn't fulfilling the targets I was setting. This blog was always for fun and I want to keep it that way.
5. Make more effort with family and friends: Spending more time with our families over the festive period has really put things into perspective. Its so easy to get caught up in your own life, especially as time goes so quickly at the moment. I'm going to make more of an effort to text back (I am so awful at this), give loved ones a quick call when I can, and pencil in diary dates to see people.
This has been quite a serious and personal post, but I've always felt like this blog is a bit like a personal diary which I can look back at and see all the wonderful memories I have made and what I have achieved. I am really looking forward what 2015 has to offer including starting a new job later on this month!
Thank you for every view, comment, tweet and like in 2014 - I look forward to interacting with you more over the coming year. Please leave me links to your own youtube channel or blogs so I can take a look!
What are you looking forward to in the near year? xxx
All pictures are from Pinterest